


Five Times Magnus Bane & Raphael Santiago Kissed

by haroldshumjr



Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare
Genre: M/M, it all makes sense i swear, magnus calls raphael his sunshine bc of what a grump raphael is
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-25
Updated: 2016-11-25
Packaged: 2018-09-02 03:39:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,304
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8650033
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/haroldshumjr/pseuds/haroldshumjr
Summary: I honestly blame my friend for making me ship this ship more than I did. I just need my children to be happy please. Also I apologise for any mistakes. I wrote this while hungover and all in one sitting. ALSO to avoid any confusion, anytime a nickname other than mi vida is being said, it's magnus speaking. okay luv u babies and enjoy.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I honestly blame my friend for making me ship this ship more than I did. I just need my children to be happy please. Also I apologise for any mistakes. I wrote this while hungover and all in one sitting. ALSO to avoid any confusion, anytime a nickname other than mi vida is being said, it's magnus speaking. okay luv u babies and enjoy.

**_One_ **

The first time they kissed it was a quiet and warm moment at the end of December. Magnus had been spending the last few Christmases with the Santiagos and he liked it. Granted, it would have been was nice to go to church again and go to mass. His faith was such a small piece of himself that he tried not to think about anymore but it was always there. Something he never spoke about. A warlock who believed in god? It was absurd even to his own ears. So to be able to get back into the practice was nice. But he only wanted it if Raphael could have it as well. It didn’t seem fair that Magnus could have this and Rapha couldn’t.

 

They were the only ones in the kitchen as they prepared the ingredients for Guadalupe to use for dinner that night, cutting up an array of vegetables that Raphael couldn’t eat anyway. Magnus had given Raphael’s an excuse about not being able to go into church. They’d been back and forth about it for months. Raphael insisting that the burning sensation wouldn’t be so bad if he just didn’t think about it. And if Magnus was holding his hand, he wouldn’t think about it so much. But Magnus didn’t give in despite all the pouting his boyfriend tried on him. Not if it was going to hurt Raphael.

 

It wasn’t often that they got moments alone like this. And as much as he loved the Santiagos, sometimes he just wanted some time alone with his boyfriend. Especially considering their entire relationship was still a secret. He wanted to be able to hold Raphael’s hand or hold him or – god forbid – kiss him. And even in the chaos of trying to prepare the food before they all came back from mass, all Magnus could think about was kissing Raphael and how good it’d probably feel.

 

In the chaos, they somehow bumped into each other in the middle of the small kitchen, making the both of them laugh. Their faces was mere inches apart, close enough for Magnus to take in Raphael’s scent. It reminded him of home. The smile playing on his lips was playful as he gazed down at his boyfriend, his gaze mischievous.

 

“No mistletoe, mi vida. We can’t kiss without it.”

 

Raphael’s gaze matched Magnus’ as he looked up challengingly at his boyfriend, his tone just as challenging. Magnus rolled his eyes before snapping his fingers until a mistletoe appeared just above their heads. The grins that curled up at their lips matched the other’s before leaning into each other, their lips meeting softly. Raphael never felt cold anymore. Not after he turned anymore but he never felt warm either. But when their lips met, it was like a nice small ember lit in his chest.

 

“Feliz Navidad, mi sol.”

 

**_Two_ **

Magnus as a general rule liked to stay optimistic because when he lost his footing and got lost in his head, there was no knowing how long it’ll take before he came back to everyone. And it wasn’t something that he spoke about much which means nobody really noticed it. After Christmas, there’d been news about warlocks being hunted down. They started out as rumors, just whispers about a warlock hunter in Western Europe. It’s been so far away that he hadn’t given it a second thought. But then some of the younger warlocks in New York had been hunted down and it shook him.

 

Magnus never really had anything to live for. There was never really nothing tying him down to this world before. He had his friends and they loved each other. But they wouldn’t mourn for him probably. And then he met Raphael and it wasn’t about making it through the day with a mask on his face. It was about knowing his home was actually a home to come home to. It was about knowing that someone would actually mourn him if he were ever gone. Selfish as it was, it was nice to feel treasured by someone whom he loved more than a lot of thing that he would ever care to mention. And the thought of dying, for once, shook him.

 

Raphael had moved in just days before under the pretense that Magnus had things to teach Raphael. Neither of them was sure Guadalupe actually bought it but she didn’t stop Raphael. Her Raphael was grown now, no longer the 16-year-old boy that came home to her even if he never aged a day. And even though they knew each other, Magnus had never gotten like this. It was nothing at first, just Magnus’ laughs sounding more forced, and the smiles slightly more taut. But then the warlock started locking himself in his room for days on end and it scared Raphael. They finally had each other. He wasn’t going to lose Magnus just yet. Not when they promised forever to each other.

 

It’d been two days since Magnus left his room before he finally emerged, his eyes looking swollen, his skin lacking it’s usual golden hue. Getting to his feet, Raphael walked over to Magnus with the intention to yell at him to stop all of this. But when Magnus finally looked at him, he couldn’t bring himself to get angry. Not when the love of his life looked so broken and pained and _scared_. Instead, he tip toed as he guided Magnus down so that their lips met. There was hesitation from both of them before the kiss was deepened, desperation translating into the kisses.

 

“Come back to me, Mi Vida.”

 

**_Three_ **

It wasn’t like Raphael was expecting it to be easy to tell his mother that he’d fallen in love for the first time and it was with a man. He’d expected anger and yelling and more anger. He could handle that. His entire argument had been relying on her getting angry and for him to plead for her to see that he was still her boy. The little boy who used to need kisses when he scraped his knee when he played outside or the little boy who used to try and sneak dinner early when he thought she wasn’t paying attention. What he hadn’t been counting on was the silence that met his words. All the pleas that he’d had prepared died on his tongue as she told him to leave so that she could think.

 

Magnus found Raphael staring blankly at the television as he lay on the couch when he got home to his loft. At first he was worried that Raphael was sick before remembering the conversation that they had that morning. Now, Magnus had a solution to everything, all the time. And from the way that Raphael was looking up at him, he knew that his boyfriend was thinking the same thing. Magnus had to fix this. But he never had a family. After his mother and his step father, Magnus decided to stop seeking the approval of others. But he understood that Raphael didn’t function the same way. Raphael needed to know that his mother still loved him. And for once, Magnus didn’t have a solution.

 

Instead, he shrugged his jacket off his shoulders before joining his boyfriend on his couch. He wrapped his arm around his boyfriend’s shoulder before puling him close, turning Raphael’s head so that their gazes met. The warmth in Raphael’s eyes was such a dichotomy to the cold skin that met Magnus every time. Not that he was complaining. He would happily take Raphael any way that he came. Leaning forward, he pressed his lips gently to Raphael’s. His lips were gentle as he tried to coax Raphael from out of his mind, his hand gently cradling the other’s face.

 

He’d been lying if he said he wasn’t expecting this and so was Raphael, he suspected. But reality was always more painful than the scenarios that we came up with our head. No matter how prepared we think we are, rejection from someone we loved always hurt. And right now, he knew Raphael was in more pain than he could voice out. The loneliness and the isolation that Magnus was so used to were hitting Raphael.

 

“You’ll be okay, mi amor.”

 

**_Four_**

It was no secret that Magnus was a jealous person. He wasn’t a possessive person by any means but he was certainly one who felt jealousy very intensely. He eyed the way Lily looked at Raphael, clenching his jaw. And he knew that Raphael would never cheat on him but it still wasn’t really an ideal situation to look at the way the vampire clung on to Raphael’s every word. Not that he blamed her, of course. Part of the reason Magnus loved Raphael so much was precisely because he was so charismatic and intelligent, getting anyone to listen to him and command respect. And that was probably all that it was.

 

Until he saw the way she put her hand on Raphael’s thigh, making both him and Raphael stiffen. His jaw was clenched tightly as his eyes flashed. He didn’t want to interfere but the jealousy coursed in him, undoing every insecure thought that he packed tightly away. The last time he had a relationship this serious was with Camille who’d of course cheated on him. And he knew Camille and Raphael were not the same person. Camille was a cold, vindictive bitch who didn’t care about anyone but herself. His Rapha was warm and did anything he could to make Magnus happy. Rapael was more than Magnus could ever deserve and yet it didn’t help at all.

 

All Magnus could think about was the times that he couldn’t be around Raphael because work had to take him away from his boyfriend or the bad days he had where he couldn’t do anything but stay silent as his thoughts consumed him. Magnus wasn’t an easy to be with and the fear that he wasn’t good enough was so real, especially not in that moment. Magnus had been away for several weeks now while Lily had probably been by Raphael’s side all the while, filling the space that Magnus had so convenient left vacant.

 

Normally, he would up and leave. Just turn around and not put up a fight because he’d decided that no one was important enough to make him feel small. But this was Rapha. Rapha who was supposed to be his forever. Rapha who was his sunshine. And no, Magnus was not a usually possessive person but like hell he reminded Raphael and himself who the vampire belonged to.

 

Plastering a smile to his face, he marched into the room of the dumort that he so hated. He bent down, cradling Raphael’s face gently before bending down to press a kiss to his lips. This kiss wasn’t particularly chaste and he could hear a few gasps from behind him, making satisfaction bloom in his chest.

 

“I’ve missed you, mon ange.”

 

**_Five_ **

Raphael didn’t remember much from the few past hours except that his hunger was starting to hurt him. The pain in his throat burned as the fresh blood dripped down the mundane’s shirt. The boy’s pleas was nothing but a dull noise in his background as Raphael fed to sate the pain in his stomach. In the back of his mind, he could hear Camille’s approval and warmth unfurled in him. He didn’t know when it even started except that he needed Camille to like him. Camille needed to approve everything that he did. He knew it was hurting him but it was all that mattered. Camille would have been so proud.

 

But then the weight of his actions hit him like a freight train as he watched the boy that he just drained lay at his feet. If his heart could beat, it would have been racing in his chest in that moment with fear. Fear of what he could do. Fear that Magnus wouldn’t love him anymore. He could easily go back to the dumort and show Camille what he did but he needed to go home to Magnus whether to seek validation or just confirm the insecurities that were coursing through him.

 

As he trudged back to the loft, all he could think about was what Magnus would think. The warlock was always his port of call for these things. They always had each other’s back but this wasn’t the same. This time, Raphael let himself be the monster that his mother was constantly trying to pray away. He became the monster of his own nightmares.

 

The moment he reached the loft, everything was a blur. He was still waiting for the rejection and disgust that he knew would inevitable come. But all Magnus did was wash the blood that was caking on his arms and his mouth. He remembered the sound of running water before something warm enveloped him. Raphael was too wrapped up in his mind, waiting for Magnus to say that it was over. That the warlock could never love a monster like him but it never came. It was all a haze until he felt Magnus’ familiar lips pressed against his and everything suddenly came back into focus. The sweet scent of Magnus’ bath salts. The taste of cigarettes and scotch and something sweet – caramel? – that was so uniquely Magnus. The feeling of Magnus’ lips pressing gently against him, making him feel like himself again. Making him feel like he was real and human. That he was not the boy who was beyind saving. As he pulled away, he met Magnus’ gaze and it was the same look in his eyes that he saw decades ago. The fierce hope that Magnus harboured for him.

 

“You’re going to be alright, mi sol.”

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading!!! come say hi over [here](demonveiined.tumblr.com) if you like :))))


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